Včera mi přišel email od kamaráda ze školy, který se mi zalíbil natolik, že ho sem postnu. Bohužel zdroj nebyl uveden, takže pokud byste věděli, napište do komentářů.

Zajímavý text "Jak se pozná český občan? " je pouze v angličtině a obsahuje 56 bodů. Kdo anglicky neumí, nechť použije třeba slovnik(ale bacha, abyste nedopadli jako tohle:)

You know you're form the Czech Republic when:
1. Ice hockey excites you more than football because your the best.
2. the thought of picking mushrooms is more appealing than sex in the morning.
3. you think Czech dubbing is better than the original dialogue for the movie.
4. your boyfriend/gir­lfriend wears the same top all week.
5. deodorant has never touched you armpits or your boyfriend has never had soap there.
6. your girlfriend shaves her pubic hair more than you shave your face.
7. you dance in 9/8 time to a basic 4/4 time chart song, otherwise known as, like a total spastic.
8. your girlfriend wears the same colour of tights as your grandmother eg. light brown.
9. you need pictures of Chinese food on the menu,because it's another nationality you don't trust.
10. you leave a space on the inside so nobody can sit down on the metro, bus or tram (a lazy bastard).
11. you politely stand up to let pensioners sit down on the tram, metro and tram.
12. during dancing school lessons you boyfriend turns up with a suit that's 10 times too big for him.
13. your boyfriend wears sandals and grey socks, but would secretly like to wear white.
14. you think the mullet is sexy eg. Jagr's old hair cut. And you think dreadlocks are new.
15. you find out that every Czech girl has or would like to have an affair with a married man.
16. you don't know which pub to go to, because they're empty or have reserved signs on the table for nobody.
17. your boyfriend pulls his trousers up passed his belly button.
18. your boyfriend has his mobile phone attached to his belt in some pathetic wallet, otherwise looking like a total nerd.
19. your girlfriend has a long distance relationship with some foreigner. Or she's cheating on you with a foreigner at home.
20. your girlfriend was once a au-pair and had an affair with the dad.
21. you watch beauty contests everyweek due to having too many good looking women eg. Miss Prague,Miss Skoda,Miss Deaf,Miss Gypsy.....
22. you start early at work and finished late with no overtime pay. Otherwise known as working like a donkey; eeeoooo!You can always blame it on ICQ
23. you don't like Russians, Ukrainians, Vietnamese, Germans, Americans…because they're loud or don't pay their taxes.
24. you buy beer because water is too expensive.
25. you can't stop drinking beer.
26. you know someone who has worked in the sex industry.
27. you think it's ok to be rude in any kind of service job.
28. you say nevim to every question or nic moc, yo, yo.
29. you say you don't speak English because you wish all tourists would fuck off.
30. you're proud not to believe in God.
31. the weekend cottage is heaven and many things can happen there eg another affair.
32. you're a gorgeous girl with hooker boots.
33. you think ska music is something new.
34. you wish Stalin or Hitler had exterminated the Romany population.
35. you prefer to have cold meat and cheese on the outside of the rohliku rather than inside.
36. you run for the metro train even though it's moving away.
37. you let your dog shit on the pavement.
38. you try to kill people with your car even though they're on the zebra crossing
39. your girlfriend thinks she's fat even though she has a body like a goddess.
40. every language is easy compared to Czech,you speak at least three languages and your education is best.
41. you say dobry den to total strangers even when their breath smells of garlic.
42. your girlfriend doesn't worry about condoms.
43. you think that every song in the world was originally sung in Czech.
44. you spend most of your life in a bad mood and being impolite, then blame it on something else eg. communism, which happened before you were born.
45. you have no shower curtain because you like to sit in your own dirt when having a shower.
46. you steal ketchup from McDonald's and blame it on the Romany population.
47. you wear white training shoes to relief your feet from those sexy knee length hooker boots.
48. you think rat tails are cool to hide your flat back head.
49. all your football stadiums are empty, but still produce great players.
50. you hitch-hike with total strangers to Brno eg Charles Manson.
51. you think there's too many people from the USA teaching in Prague.
52. you dance to “the final countdown” by Europe every weekend in Lucerna or Futurum.
53. you have 80s music everywhere and great classical music.
54. you sell Stella in every expensive bar.
55. you think a rhombus with a vertical line in the middle is a vagina.
56. your grandmother or grandfather played at least three musical instruments at semi professional level.

Zalinkuj

Psali jsme jinde:

IDOS v novém a po staru

Cena Plyšový lev zrušena:(

Mládí vpřed, český jazyk vzad

Vytvoř si svého Simpsona

Třikrát hurá pro český trailer